We all have that one person at work that we subconsciously get excited to see every day. Whether you call them your work spouse or office crush, some of these connections have merit.
Things get a little complicated when dealing with married colleagues.
So, what are the signs that a married female coworker likes you?
Are the sparks just in your head, or is there truly something there worth pursuing?
Here are a few telltale signs a married female coworker likes you.
Subtle but consistent physical contact
That is one of the most accurate signs a female coworker likes you. It is all in the body language and those subtle touches on the hand or shoulder as you talk.
It could be how close she stands next to you in the elevator or sits next to you in the board room.
It could even be a hug that lingers noticeably longer than those given to other co-workers.
Whatever it is, this shows their desire to connect to you physically. When you notice physical attraction, it is a sign she may be interested in you.
She is staring at you and making a lot of eye contact
Women are not always the most subtle when it comes to staring at men that they are interested in.
It makes catching your married colleague staring at you one of the most obvious signs that she might be into you!
It is something that she may find herself subconsciously doing as a way to appreciate what attracts you to her. However, some married women tend to purposely maintain eye contact to let you know that they are very interested in you.
Whatever the case, if you catch her staring at you on several different occasions or stealing glances, your married co-worker is probably interested in being more than just your colleague.
That friend at work is driving you nuts? Learn how to tell a friend you like her.
She wants to know ALL about you
If your married colleague likes you, she will go out of her way to learn as much about you as she can. This will be different from any idle office banter you may have with any other people in the office.
She will want to hear more about your personal interests, dreams, and life goals, your past, and basically all there is to know about you. All this is in an attempt to get to know you better and develop a personal relationship.
She asks for your help a lot
A married woman who likes you may also whip out the old “damsel in distress” trick to get some more one-on-one time with you. It could be anything from asking for help working the printer to consulting you on matters that may not even be a part of your job description.
The chances are that she already knows how to do all that herself, but she would much rather watch you do it and spend time with you in the process.
This one works as a great clue, mainly if your female co-worker makes a habit of turning to you and only you for help.
Or offers to help you instead
We live in the 21st century, and damsels in distress sometimes like to play the role of the knight in shining armor. In these cases, you may notice your female colleague going above and beyond what she needs to do to help you.
As with asking for help, her main intention when offering her time and expertise to bail you out of a fix at work is to have some extra time with you.
They may also take this opportunity to drop more hints like asking questions that help her get to know you a bit more.
She leaves cute gifts/surprises at your desk
A woman in love does not need special circumstances like an office secret Santa or your birthday to shower you with gifts. She will leave you cute little gifts and surprises for absolutely no reason at all.
This shows that she really likes you and wants to make you feel as special as you make her feel.
She may take things to the next level with this clue by leaving you gifts that have a special mean whether it is a gag gift based on an inside joke or a sentimental surprise she came up with stories you told her.
She gives you innocent compliments
When trying to figure out whether a married woman from your workplace actually likes you, compliments can shed a lot of light.
However, it is important to understand that women, in general, are very free and open with their compliments, even with platonic intentions.
It is the contents and frequency of these compliments that will let you know whether she likes you as a friend and colleague or as something more.
The compliments tend to frequent, cute, and often suggestive without necessarily being inappropriate with the latter. She may also compliment you on weird little quirks of yours that no one else points out.
She shows interest in your personal life
A woman who is super interested in you at work will not only want to know everything about you but will also place special emphasis on your personal life.
She may ask detailed questions about past or present relationships, family, or any other deeply personal subjects that may otherwise not naturally come up in conversations with other people in the office.
This is a strategy that married women interested in dating other people use to create a bond. By opening up to her, she gets to learn more about you while also slowly but surely earning your trust.
What better way to start a relationship?
And shares details about hers
In addition to asking personal questions, if your married co-worker is interested in you, she will also be very eager to open up and share details about her own life.
She may talk about her interests, guilty pleasures, monumental memories, and whatever else you ask for, or she feels she would like to share.
A sign that things are getting serious and she actually really likes you is if she brings up or is comfortable with you asking about her marriage.
If she is willing to open up about things that made her consider finding alternative partners, then you are on the road to potentially building something solid.
She keeps your inside jokes going
I would argue that there are few things as heartwarming and as stinking cute as office romances littered with inside jokes. Maybe you have a nickname for someone at the office that you both don’t like. It could be an inside joke from a fun memory that the two of you share.
If a woman at work likes you, she will not only play along with these secret gags but will keep them going and even help with the evolution of the joke.
This is where gag gifts from inside jokes that you share come in handy as a clue that your married colleague at work is interested in being more than friends.
She teases you a lot
The one thing workplaces and school playgrounds have in common is that sometimes teasing is used as a love language. You could therefore deduce that your married co-worker likes you based on whether they tease you a lot.
It is different from bullying in that the teasing is light and in good fun. She may also partake in the teasing as a solo thing instead of piling on to other colleagues teasing you.
She may also tease you with funny things she learned from asking personal questions. This is how she will show you that she likes you and actually pays attention to the things you share with her.
She asks to get together outside of work
Married women do not have all the time in the world. So if she makes time to hang out with you outside of work, she is likely very interested in you.
She could ask you out for drinks after the office day or invite you to her events.
The most crucial distinction between this and platonic hangouts is that when a woman is interested, the invitations are limited to you alone and not the entire office or a large group of colleagues.
She reaches out during non-office hours
In addition to inviting you out after work, another sign a married female co-worker likes you is when she reaches out to you during non-office hours. That includes informal calls, casual text messages, or even social media flirting.
Remember that she is trying hard to communicate and spend time with you outside of work when she doesn’t have to, and more importantly, when she could get into trouble for it.
So, she must like you!
She makes a point to remember the little things
When a woman likes you, she tends to remember the tiny details. It includes everything from your birthday and your favorite lunch order to that drunken anecdote you told during an office Christmas party.
If your married co-worker casually brings up these details, it could mean that she likes you.
They may also go out of their way to get gifts or make thoughtful gestures based on the information they remember, which is even more of a sign that she is interested in you.
She notices changes about you
Your cuffed co-worker may also show her interest by picking up on subtle changes in your life that no one else at work notices or comments on. It could be a new haircut or a new pair of shoes that you got.
Women usually notice these things because they are very attentive to anything and everything they can use to learn more about you, from your behavior to physical appearance.
By commenting on these subtle changes and complimenting you, she wants you to know that she noticed and that you are someone that she actually thinks about.
She stands up for you
If your female co-worker serves as your cheerleader, lawyer, and workplace rights activist, the chances are that she is really into you.
She will defend you when you are getting unfairly picked on. She will back up ideas that you pitch. And when she’s not piling up on your teasing session, she will come to your defense if other people at the office start to take the teasing too far.
That’s not all with this clue. A married co-worker who likes you will not only defend you but also praise you to your boss and other colleagues. They will usually do this professionally and will highlight your achievements, impressive work ethic, and whatever else makes you look good to the rest of your colleagues.
She shares her secrets
It is one thing for a woman who likes you to open up and share details of her personal life with you. It is an entirely different and arguably more powerful thing for her to share her secrets.
These may be details about her life there probably no one else at work or in her life knows about her. Secrets, in this case, may include traumatic experiences, mistakes she has made, and deeply personal issues that she may be dealing with.
All this shows she feels comfortable around you, and that she trusts you not only with her secrets but also to offer a safe space for her to share them.
She puts more effort into her appearance
That happens almost ubiquitously with all married women interested in other men. So, if you are curious about whether or not your co-worker is making moves, pay close attention to her appearance.
You may notice that she has changed how she does her hair or makeup all of a sudden. She could also start dressing in more flattering outfits.
What gives it away the most is when she starts hanging out around you more after these changes. She may be intentionally or subconsciously trying to get you to notice and comment on the effort.
Sometimes, the woman may not be very subtle with her approach and her true intentions show in her body language. In this case, look out for blatant flirting.
In addition to physical touch, how she talks to you and what she talks about could be a significant clue.
Does she talk about personal things?
Does she tease you?
Does she make jokes with subliminal meanings?
If the answer on all three accounts is yes, she may be flirting with you – and this usually happens when they are interested in pursuing some form of relationship or maybe even start an affair.
She tries to get your attention
This is probably the easiest sign that your married co-worker likes you. She will do anything it takes to get you to notice her.
If she is the outgoing and extroverted type, this may involve her being very loud and animated as she interacts with other people near you. That way, she gets your attention without having to address you directly.
This attention-grabbing could also be more subtle, like putting a bit more effort into her body language and how she looks when coming to work. So pay attention – if you notice a new perfume, hairstyle, or an elevated sense of style all of a sudden, she is probably trying to get you to notice her.
It’s all in the smile
Another one of the best signs a female coworker is attracted to you is the smile. Of course, women have many reasons to smile. Maybe it is a bonus season, or she just landed a major deal. However, if she smiles more at you than other people around you, there may be something there.
It could also be in how she smiles at you in addition to the frequency. If it is a bashful or seductive smile, chances are very high that your married co-worker has a huge crush on you.
Check out this article to learn the differences between crush vs. love.
She always finds an excuse to be near you
It is particularly easy to notice if your job doesn’t have you close to each other. Whether it is separate working spaces or different schedules, if a married woman likes you, she will always find a way to be near you.
She could hang around a little after her shift to say hey. She may consistently come over to your space with all sorts of excuses, from borrowing paper to merely saying hi.
That shows that she wants to be around you, whether it is to get to know you better or revel in physical chemistry.
She seems jealous when you flirt with other female coworkers
Another clue to help you figure out whether your married co-worker likes you is if she acts jealous when you interact with other women around you.
It could be that pretty client you attended to at work, another female co-worker who also seems to be interested in you or anyone else.
She may show her jealousy passive-aggressively by giving you the silent treatment or actively by interrupting you while talking to the other female coworkers.
You may also notice her asking sneaky questions to try and gauge your interactions and level of connections with her perceived competition.
Other people in the office start to tease you about it
You may not always have the best radar to pick up on these subtle signs that a married female coworker likes you. Fortunately, every office has that person or group of constantly vigilant whiffs of office romance.
What you do not pay attention to, everyone else definitely will. And if you are close enough, you might get a lot of teasing about it.
So, listen to your other colleagues when they mention that someone may be interested. Sometimes the outside perspective is the clearest.
She could just straight up tell you
You could also be lucky enough to have a married co-worker who is frank and just straight up tells you that they are interested in you.
In this case, you don’t need to go on detective mode or fight your nosy colleagues. All you have to do is decide what to do next.
Unfortunately, not many married women are bold enough to make such a vulnerable move, so always keep an eye out for the other telltale signs.